Before I had children I knew all there was to parenting. I was the best parent in town. I knew how to address every single issue, and I had detailed plans to how I would encourage sleep, eating, and I was breastfeed my daughter until she was at least 2. AT LEAST.
Then I had my daughter. I was pretty good at one kid after awhile. I learned that I don’t know everything about parenting, but I do know a LOT. I am a fantastic baby whisperer, I am the BEST at getting kids to sleep long stretches (see: swaddle yo baby!) and my daughter also loves to eat. We had small struggles, she hated eating until we just found the right food, now she loves it and will eat everything. She only cries when she has a need, because she has no reason to cry otherwise.
Overall, parenting has been easy for us. Parenting is easy, I don’t understand why parents struggle so much. I can help them. I can help them all. They ALL NEED MY OPINION.
Then I had number two.
Now I get it. I got the kid the doesn’t sleep. Everyone wished that upon me, so congratulations all my wonderful friends and family who hoped I would someday get a child that sleeps never, you got your wish. No amount of swaddling makes him want to sleep more (although he does sleep longer when swaddled). My kid has said a giant eff you mommy to the majority of my swaddle attempts!
Having two children has vastly changed my life. I used to think I was the sleep guru, and a pro parent. Well obviously that’s all wrong. Ha!
Things I have learned since becoming a parent of two:
– Clean house. lolololrofllolol
– No TV. lolololroflololol
– I will never be caught up on laundry again.
– The sounds of my eyelids closing is the loudest noise in the universe.
– Clean is actually a relative term.
– Peaceful bath time is a joke.
– I’m still a great parent, even if my kid never sleeps.
Do you have two children? What have you learned?